a definate no, nope, nada, no way jose

we are not pregnant… not even a little bit…

even feeling sure that the big *no* was a-coming did nothing to prepare me for the intensity of the disappointment/the funk/the perpetual weepy frown that started to settle in after the first negative test…

i am one unhappy gal

[thanks for all the well wishes, your hope that would not die… my little bits of hope enjoyed the company while it lasted]


8am on sunday…

* the kitties are home, such a relief… they are a little skitish, but full of energy and MISCHIEF. we may never know for sure what they had, but we do know that their white blood count was so low that the were on the edge of death… sobering

* it is 8am on SUNDAY and our upstairs neighbors are dropping of their 1 1/2 yr old son in a minute for us to watch him while they go into the city to get inseminated… good to have *family* in the building… but 8am on SUNDAY? had to drag my ass out of bed to be awake for when he arrives… love the little guy, but would rather see him in about 4 hours.

* it is too early to test, so i have tested twice… bet you read that and said, huh? did i read that wrong?? no, i tested yesterday am and this morning… nothing good to report. we thought we saw a hint of a line starting up top on the first day, but nothing today… i know it is too early to say for sure, but NOT doing much to make me think we will get a positive. i have been having cramps for 4 or more days, had a tiny bit of color yesterday and nothing since. either i am going to have the WORST period of my life, or there is something weird goin on… i guess tomorrow, or the arrival of said worst period will tell.

shaping up to be a long day 😉

xxoo mulberry

because we have got to stick together

as you know, a while ago dakota and i had a had major blow to our baby plans from our insurance company… if you read eva’s post at eggdroppost, you know she is currently in insurance hell…

if you have ever wanted to fight it and just didn’t know where to start, this article is a must read. it is not really in my nature to *quote* the WSJ. i read parts of it for work and that is about it…

but, WE HAVE GOT TO STICK TOGETHER and share every tool we can find! so if your insurance company has not covered something you thought they were going to… read away ladies, and start writing those letters!!!

to read it on the WSJ website, here is the link

for those of us who just what the info now! here it is quoted from the WSJ

SEPTEMBER 25, 2008
Pushing Back When Insurers Deny Coverage for Treatment

Battling a health insurer when it refuses to cover certain treatments can be aggravating and time-consuming. But if you choose to join the growing number of people who are appealing coverage denials, there are several strategies that can bolster your case.

More and more people are appealing insurers’ denials of coverage, but that doesn’t mean it’s gotten any easier. Watch the story of on couple’s struggle to get the treatment they wanted. WSJ’s Anna Matthews reports. (Sept. 25)

Some health-coverage problems — such as when your doctor enters a wrong code on a claim form — can be resolved with a phone call. But other issues can be more difficult, because they center on complex medical questions like whether a certain cancer treatment is appropriate for you. Faced with such a situation, you may need to enlist help from your doctor, and even do some scientific research of your own. As a last resort, most states will consider appeals that have been denied by private insurers.

Insurance companies generally don’t disclose how many appeals they receive. But state regulators keep data on the frequency of cases filed with them, and the trend is up — 12% growth between 2004 and 2006, according to a survey by America’s Health Insurance Plans, an industry group, which says such appeals represented less than one out of every 10,000 insured people. That’s a small share of the total, though, since most appeals never get to the state bodies.

New York’s regulator, the state Insurance Department, is one of the few agencies that also keeps track of how many people in its state file appeals with health insurers. In 2007, the number was 33,355, up 18% since 2004.
Self Protection

Having a game plan when fighting a health insurer’s denial of coverage can better your odds of a successful appeal.

* First, find out what led to the insurer’s decision, and keep a careful paper trail.
* Be prepared to prove that your treatment qualifies for coverage under your plan.
* Even if your insurer rejects your appeal, most states will consider appeals as a last resort.

Why the increase in appeals? Patient advocates and state officials say the weak economy and ever-rising health-care costs put pressure on insurers to squeeze expenses by denying claims, and leave consumers watching their spending more closely. But the insurance-industry group says the growth is likely fueled by insurers’ efforts to educate consumers about their rights. Several companies say they are working to make the process easier, but many aspects are mandated by state regulators.

In any case, appealing an insurer’s decision is often complex and tricky, and the deck can seem stacked against you. It is often hard for consumers to know what is covered and what isn’t in an insurance plan. Indeed, insurers have been winning a majority of the cases reviewed by state regulators in recent years, with victories for insurers at 59% in 2006.

Here are some ways you may be able to better your odds.
Getting Started

First, figure out what led to the denial of coverage and learn your insurer’s procedure for appeals. When you call your health plan to get the information, take notes and get names. If the problem can’t be readily resolved, you should ask the insurer for some key documents to reconstruct what led to the rejection.
An Appealing Option

If you are considering appealing a decision by your health plan, here are some online resources that can help.

Tips and tutorials on how to file an appeal:

* In-depth explanation from the Kaiser Family Foundation and Consumers Union

* Step-by-step guide from the Patient Advocate Foundation

* Tips from the Connecticut Healthcare Advocate’s office, including how to write an appeal letter

Where to call for advice

There are a growing number of health consumer advocacy operations that will work with people who want to file appeals. Before you hire anyone, ask about fees and success rates.


* The Patient Advocate Foundation is a nonprofit that works on appeals

* Families USA offers links to state-based advocacy organizations and state-government health advocates. Not all of these groups work on appeals.

Some of these companies work mainly for employers who hire them to help employees, so check if your employer has hired one, or ask if the advocate can be hired by individuals:

* Health Advocate (for employers)/Health Proponent (for consumers)

* Patient Care

* Care Counsel

You will need the denial letter. You should also get a copy of your plan’s full benefits language, sometimes called the “Evidence of Coverage,” as well as the detailed guidelines that explain what the company considers medically necessary. Some companies, such as Cigna Inc. and Aetna Inc., post their medical policies online.

Sometimes the appeal is straightforward. Murielle Curcio, 51 years old, of San Jose, Calif., was told by Blue Shield of California last October that it wouldn’t pay for a genetic test to gauge her risk of breast cancer. The letter said the test hadn’t been preauthorized by the company or performed by her primary-care physician. With more than $3,000 at stake, Ms. Curcio enlisted the help of Health Advocate Inc., a firm that works under contract with her employer.

Ms. Curcio filed an appeal in January. She says she got a letter from the testing lab confirming that her physician had ordered the test and that his office had been told by the insurer that it would be covered. In her appeal, Ms. Curcio also cited the insurer’s policies to argue that such tests were covered by her plan, and that she was a medically appropriate candidate. A few weeks later, Blue Shield paid for the test.

A Blue Shield of California official said he couldn’t comment specifically on Ms. Curcio’s case because the insurer hadn’t received a release form from her. But the official said appeals often stem from a lack of complete information, and “the most common reason for overturning a decision is, we get information we didn’t get at the outset.”
Building a Case

After you gather the facts, set a strategy. Your appeal may hinge on proving that your treatment qualifies for coverage under your plan’s benefits and rules. Tom Bridenstine, managed-care ombudsman for the state of Virginia, says he once worked with a consumer whose insurer refused to pay for bariatric surgery because such obesity treatments weren’t allowed benefits. Mr. Bridenstine says he helped win a reversal by showing that the woman’s weight issue was actually a symptom of a rare disease.

Many appeals focus on demonstrating that a treatment is scientifically proven and medically necessary. Your doctor should be able to write a detailed letter on your behalf. You also may be able to bolster your case by researching the scientific evidence online on sites like pubmed.gov, sponsored by the National Library of Medicine.

David Foglesong, a history professor from Montgomery Township, N.J., began searching medical databases soon after Horizon Blue Cross Blue Shield of New Jersey declined to pay for a targeted chemotherapy treatment for his wife, RoseMary. During one library visit, he found a new study that showed the treatment had helped patients with conditions similar to his wife’s disease, advanced sarcoma that had spread to her liver.

The couple, advised by Patient Advocate Foundation, a nonprofit group, solicited new letters from Ms. Foglesong’s doctors, and her primary oncologist argued on her behalf in a conference call with the insurance company’s reviewers in June. The company reversed its earlier decision, and Ms. Foglesong, 49, got the treatment in July.

Horizon officials say the procedure was initially denied because it was deemed experimental and not the standard for Ms. Foglesong’s condition. The company said a review committee reversed that decision because of the “whole totality of her case,” including the medical literature.
Last Resort

Even if your insurer rejects your appeal, you still have other options. If your employer has a self-funded health plan, which might be administered by a private insurer but is backed by the employer, your next step is often to sue in federal court, a tough and expensive proposition.
If your insurer has denied your appeal, here are other resources to try.

* If you have an individual policy, or your employer is fully insured, you can probably appeal to your state’s outside review process. The industry trade group America’s Health Insurance Plans includes shortcuts to many state agencies.
* If you have Medicare, you can’t use the state appeals process, but the federal program has its own review procedure: see guide for instructions.
* If you are in an employer plan that is self-insured (meaning the company backs the plan itself), you also generally can’t use the state review processes. The Department of Labor’s website has information on the appeals process for such plans.

But if your coverage is with an insurance company, either through your employer or an individual policy, you can opt for your state’s appeals process. Check with the agency, because the 44 states that offer independent reviews won’t handle all kinds of issues, and each has its own rules.

Sharon Hines, 52, of Middletown, Conn., appealed to the state after her insurer refused to pay for Avastin, an expensive biotech drug that has drawn debate over what uses are justified. Ms. Hines, an oncology nurse practitioner, says she and her husband, a truck driver, couldn’t afford the roughly $100,000 a year cost of the treatment.

Ms. Hines said her insurer, ConnectiCare Inc., a subsidiary of Health Insurance Plan of Greater New York, had raised various objections to Avastin, including that there wasn’t evidence the treatment would work for someone, like her, who had previously taken Tarceva, another cancer drug. In August, the state’s reviewer ruled that Avastin was medically necessary because Ms. Hines would be getting it with first-line chemotherapy, its approved use. “It was such a sense of relief,” she says.

In a statement, a ConnectiCare official said the independent oncologist who reviewed Ms. Hines’s appeal for the company “did not agree with the use of Avastin” and the insurer followed his recommendation. When the insurer got the state review’s decision “we immediately covered the drug for her….We wish her well with her courageous battle.”
Medicare Appeals

For Medicare beneficiaries, there is a separate, federal appeals-review process. That is what Ellen and Paul Hoppe used after Health Net of California, the Health Net Inc. unit that provided Mr. Hoppe’s Medicare Advantage plan, declined to pay for proton-beam radiation for his prostate cancer. The denial document said there was no evidence that Mr. Hoppe, 67, would get any added advantage from proton-beam therapy, which is significantly more expensive than conventional X-ray radiation.
Need more research to bolster your appeal?

For evidence about the medical treatment you want: PubMed is a service of the U.S. National Library of Medicine that includes biomedical articles dating back to the 1950s.

Some health plans, like Aetna , Wellpoint and Cigna, post their medical policies online. Even if you’re not covered by them, you may want to compare their policies to those of your plan.

But the Hoppes, phone-company retirees in California, were convinced that proton-beam therapy carried a lower risk of side effects such as incontinence. They got backing from Mr. Hoppe’s doctor at Loma Linda University Medical Center, who wrote a six-page letter, including two pages of research citations. In June, Medicare’s appeals contractor sided with the Hoppes, saying the proton-beam therapy qualified for the federal standard of “reasonable and necessary” treatment.

Health Net said in a statement that it couldn’t comment on Mr. Hoppe’s case because it hadn’t received a release from him. But it said, “Any single portrayal of a less-than-satisfactory customer service experience does not represent the overall experience of our customers.” A Health Net spokesman added that medical coverage decisions aren’t affected by the cost of treatment.

Navigating the health-care maze is tough, and we are increasingly asked to make our own choices. In the new biweekly column Healthy Consumer, Anna Wilde Mathews explores costs and values, and how to be a smart health-care consumer.

Write to Anna Wilde Mathews at anna.mathews@wsj.com

feline distemper :(

we think the little kitties have feline distemper… dakota and shenandoah had to leave them at the animal hospital overnight (heartbreaking… trouble jumped back into the carrier, ready to go home and they had to take her OUT and leave her and squint actually used his kitty voice to show his great displeasure – something he almost never does) and they may have to stay several days.

if it is distemper it is very serious. the vibe in our house wavers from somber to hopeful to somber… we will disinfect the house and keep calling in for updates (so far the vet techs say they are doing well, eating and keeping it down, and they are so cute that they are getting a lot of attention there which is good). we will do what we can to prepare for them to come back home… i can’t even think about them NOT coming home!

we love them so much, these little furballs that hitchhiked into our lives just two months ago!

trouble (red girl on the left) squint (black and white fella on the right)

ok, doc called again and is woefully confused, they are doing SO well, she can’t imagine they really have distemper… that is GREAT and NOT SO GREAT cause that means we may be back to *no idea* what is wrong with our fuzzies 😦

cranky! R-E-A-L-L-Y cranky! [with edit]

4 more days till we test… both kitties are barfing and have the runs (dakota and shenandoah took them to the kitty emergency room in the middle of the night and it looks likely that *rubber bands* have played a role – they are on their way to get x-rays!!)… 4 more days till we test… at my job i have three sets of meetings to prepare for on two coasts that will happen within the next month and a half while my ENTIRE team is being consumed by a project that is unrelated and NIGHTMARISHLY flawed in its design and 1000% out of my control… 4 more days till we test… my sweet dakota is being under appreciated and disrespected on a daily basis at her job (on the good days!)… 4 more days till we test!!!

grrrrrrrrrrr……. it is only noon!

*** seems the kitties have something viral, likely from their time in the empty lot before shenandoah rescued them (waiting on the name of the virus, it was missed in the chaos of the moment – so i am frozen unable to google my brains out) dakota said something over the cell phone, while on the drive home from LI, about 30-80% recovery rate — that is a huge, big, scary range — i LOVE these little kitties! they have to spend possibly a week at the vet… so many questions… i asked for a distraction in my previous post, this was NOT what i meant!

tears in my eyes…

loooooooong week

tomorrow will be one week since our insemination. i CAN’T believe how loooooong this week has been. and they say that the second week is harder… oh boy!

i don’t *feel* pregnant, what ever that means… but i soooo want to be.

dakota is sick, coughing and sore throat – poor sweet thing. i guess this is gonna be a rough week all around.

so, you all better have lots going on to keep me distracted 😉

4 little embryos sitting in the freeze

4 little embryos sitting in the freeze

c  –  h  –  i  –  ll  –  i  –  n  –  g

we got our updated report from the embryologists and we have 4 great looking embryos that we froze today where they will stay till we get approved to put them where they belong… in my waiting uterus!

meanwhile we wait await the 28th to see if we have a baby brewing from the IUI, which would occupy my uterus for awhile 😉 but, as you know, we are good with that!